100-Question Jewish Trivia Quiz (2)

[A] Judith | Judith seduced and beheaded the enemy general Holofernes, saving her city. She proved that sometimes the best military strategy involves wine, charm, and excellent sword skills.

[B] Solomon | Solomon's heavy taxation and forced labor led to the kingdom splitting under his son. Even wisdom can't overcome bad economic policy and overtaxing your subjects.

[B] Hezekiah | Hezekiah faced down the Assyrian army with prayer and tunnel engineering. Jerusalem survived when 185,000 Assyrians mysteriously died overnight, history's most convenient plague timing.

[C] Solomon | The Queen of Sheba visited to test Solomon's wisdom with riddles. She left impressed and possibly romantically involved, depending on which tradition you believe.

[D] Shiva | Seven days of sitting low, receiving visitors, and eating their food. It's structured grief with catering, proving Jews understand mourning requires both tears and bagels.

[A] Rehoboam | Rehoboam's "my little finger is thicker than my father's waist" speech caused the split. Political scientists still cite this as history's worst inaugural address.

[C] Rosh Hashanah | Rosh Hashanah begins ten days of intense self-reflection ending with Yom Kippur. It's basically a spiritual performance review with cosmic consequences.

[A] Doorposts | The mezuzah contains the Shema prayer in a small scroll, affixed to doorframes. Jews kiss it entering and leaving, making it the world's most touched religious object.

[D] Passover | Passover's matzah requirement leads to creative cooking and predictable digestive issues. Ancient Israelites fled Egypt so quickly their bread couldn't rise, creating millennia of constipation.

[B] Bathsheba | Bathsheba's rooftop bath changed Israel's history through adultery, murder, and eventually producing Solomon. Sometimes terrible beginnings lead to wise endings.

[A] David | David's slingshot victory proved that giant-killing requires more physics than muscle. His five smooth stones suggest he planned for missed shots, showing practical faith.

[D] Deborah | Deborah judged Israel and commanded armies when women couldn't vote in most ancient societies. She proved leadership ability ignores gender, just takes longer for recognition.

[C] Seder | The Seder follows a strict order (literally what "seder" means) including four cups of wine. By cup three, even the symbolic foods start looking appetizing.

[B] Eye for an eye | "Eye for an eye" actually limited revenge to proportional response. Before this, stubbing your toe on someone's property might cost them their farm.

[A] Zedekiah | Zedekiah watched his sons executed before being blinded and dragged to Babylon. His reign proves that ignoring prophetic warnings has historically poor outcomes.

[D] Miriam | Miriam saved baby Moses, led victory songs, and got leprosy for criticizing his wife. Her well supposedly followed Israel through the desert, providing mystical hydration.

[C] Mixing meat and dairy | No cheeseburgers because of one vague biblical verse about cooking kids in mother's milk. This led to separate dishes, sinks, and dinner complications.

[B] Teshuvah | Teshuvah means "return," implying we're always wandering off spiritually. The High Holidays basically force an annual spiritual GPS recalculation back to righteousness.

[C] Brit Milah | The brit milah happens on day eight, combining religious ceremony with minor surgery. The mohel performs this while relatives eat bagels, proving Jews multitask everything.

[B] Rebecca | Rebecca orchestrated Jacob stealing Esau's blessing through cooking and costume work. She proved that sometimes motherly love requires light fraud and goat-skin accessories.

[A] Yom Kippur | The Day of Atonement features fasting, prayer, and apologizing to everyone you've wronged. It's basically mandatory therapy with hunger pangs and communal confession.

[D] Pharaoh's Daughter | Pharaoh's daughter adopted a Hebrew baby despite her father's genocide order. She proved that teenage rebellion can occasionally save future prophets.

[D] Purim | Purim celebrates Jewish survival through beauty pageants, palace intrigue, and strategic timing. It's the one holiday where getting drunk is religiously encouraged.

[C] Torah | The Torah contains 613 commandments, from major ethics to minor agricultural law. It's history's most comprehensive legal code disguised as narrative literature.

[A] Song of Songs | This biblical love poetry gets read at Passover, connecting spring renewal with romance. It's surprisingly steamy for scripture, requiring creative theological interpretation.

[B] Pikuach Nefesh | This principle overrides almost every other Jewish law to save lives. You can break Sabbath to save someone, proving Judaism values life over ritual.

[D] Judeo-Arabic | Jews in Arab lands developed Judeo-Arabic, writing Arabic in Hebrew letters. It preserved Jewish scholarship while navigating Islamic societies for centuries.

[B] Lo Tignov | "Thou shalt not steal" seems straightforward until rabbis debate whether stealing sleep counts. Talmudic logic can complicate even the simplest commandments.

[C] Uzziah | Uzziah tried performing priestly duties and got leprosy for his trouble. He learned that job descriptions exist for reasons, especially in temples.

[A] David | David danced so enthusiastically before the Ark that his wife was embarrassed. His response? Even more undignified dancing, proving worship trumps dignity.