Verse Case Scenario: Match the Poem (2)

[B] William Blake | Drew his own angels while writing lullabies that sound vaguely threatening. Only Blake could make "sleep, sleep" sound like mystical instructions from the divine.

[C] Samuel Taylor Coleridge | Wrote this while high on opium, watching his baby sleep. Victorian parenting: contemplate existence while your infant judges your life choices silently.

[D] Robert Frost | Invented "good fences make good neighbors" but meant it ironically. New England's passive-aggressive poet laureate strikes again—subtext thicker than Vermont maple syrup.

[C] William Wordsworth | Literally put the GPS coordinates in the title. Walked everywhere, wrote about it constantly—the original Instagram travel blogger minus the sponsorships.

[A] Lord Byron | Wrote this about his cousin's wife at a funeral—peak Byron behavior. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know, but excellent at compliments apparently.

[D] Alfred Lord Tennyson | Victoria's favorite poet crying about nothing in particular. When you're poet laureate, even your emotional breakdowns need to sound majestic.

[B] Robert Burns | Apologized to a mouse for destroying its house while plowing. Scottish farmer invents empathy for rodents—PETA's retroactive founding father.

[C] Pablo Neruda | Chilean diplomat who wrote love poems between communist manifestos. Made vegetables erotic—literally has an "Ode to an Artichoke." Produce sections were never the same.

[B] Henry Wadsworth Longfellow | America's first celebrity poet who made bedtime adorable. His beard was so magnificent, birds allegedly nested in it—unverified but spiritually true.

[A] Luis G. Dato | Filipino poet writing in English when colonialism made it complicated. Brought tropical heat to Western forms—sonnets sweating in Manila humidity.

[D] William Shakespeare | Promised his verse would outlast marble monuments—nailed it. Four centuries later, we're still reading while those monuments are parking lots.

[C] Fleda Brown | Contemporary poet proving moms still inspire verse after centuries of poetry evolution. Somehow more emotionally complex than all the Romantic movement combined.

[A] Ben Jonson | "Drink to me only with thine eyes"—the Renaissance's smoothest pickup line. Worked so well it became a drawing room song Victorian ladies sang innocently.

[B] Oliver Wendell Holmes | Doctor-poet who wrote between surgeries. This poem about an old man became Boston's unofficial anthem—medical degree clearly helped with mortality themes.

[B] Henry Wadsworth Longfellow | Made the ocean sound like a meditation app before those existed. Repetition so soothing, insomniacs use it better than Ambien.

[A] Alfred Lord Tennyson | Wrote his own death poem, then lived three more years—awkward. Requested it end all his poetry collections—controlling his legacy from beyond like poetry's ghost CEO.

[A] Homer | Blind poet who maybe didn't exist but definitely started Western literature. Described every single spear thrust for 15,693 lines—the original excessive world-building.

[D] Friedrich Schiller | German poet whose words Beethoven borrowed for his Ninth Symphony. Now played at every European Union event—accidentally wrote continental unity's theme song.

[B] Henry Wadsworth Longfellow | Got the history completely wrong but nobody cares because it rhymes perfectly. American education's favorite historical fanfiction—Revere didn't even finish the ride.

[D] Lewis Carroll | Oyster genocide disguised as children's literature. The walrus feels guilty while eating—Carroll inventing ethical dilemmas for marine mammals.

[B] Alexander Pope | Wrote this at age twelve because child prodigies are exhausting. Spent his life wanting solitude while being incredibly social—the introvert's eternal paradox.

[D] John Donne | Used a blood-sucking parasite as a pickup line and somehow made it work. Proves that confidence and metaphysical conceits can overcome literally any obstacle.

[A] Ralph Waldo Emerson | Transcendentalist who found divinity in everything, including plant diseases apparently. Made crop failure philosophical—farmers everywhere remained unimpressed.

[C] Geoffrey Chaucer | Invented English literature while English was still figuring itself out. This alphabet poem proves even medieval folks needed memory tricks for their ABCs.

[B] Charles Baudelaire | French decadent who said get drunk on wine, poetry, or virtue—dealer's choice. Inspired generations of art students to justify their lifestyle choices.

[B] George Herbert | Priest who shaped poems into altars and wings because regular verses weren't holy enough. Invented concrete poetry three centuries before typewriters made it easier.

[D] Robert Herrick | Clergyman who wrote sacred and profane poetry with equal enthusiasm. Told people to gather rosebuds and find God—multitasking at its finest.

[C] Oscar Wilde | Wrote poetry between devastating witticisms and being imprisoned for homosexuality. Even his sighs were in French—extra in multiple languages.

[A] Edward Lear | Invented the runcible spoon just for this poem—kitchenware that doesn't exist for marriages that shouldn't work. Nonsense poetry's greatest love story.

[B] Ben Jonson | Literally wrote an excuse for being in love like it was homework. Renaissance poets treating emotions like legal briefs—romance with footnotes.